Three things.

1. I went to a new dentist today (that I think I’m actually going to like) and was told that because I breathe through my mouth as a result of having a constantly stuffed nose, I ought to rub vaseline on my gums when I go to sleep so they don’t dry out. I’ll let you know how that turns out for me, although I can’t imagine the taste is all that great.

2. I finally bought a new pair of shoes. I bought a pair of slip-on Clark’s when I was in England a couple years ago and have been wearing them ever since. Needless to say, they had seen better days. So, after a long, arduous process wherein I realized that no new shoe could live up to the standard I had set for my foot in terms of comfort and style, I bought a new pair of Clark’s. Unfortunately, my old pair was a once and never again model and I was forced to buy a shoe that is similar in style, but has laces. So, I’m back to having to tie my shoes again and I must say, it sucks just as bad as I remember it sucking.

3. The most important news I saved for last. While I was walking through the mall, wishing I could find better shoes, I stumbled upon a stand set up in the middle of the walkway selling perhaps one of Germany’s greatest inventions (right after the Birkenstock and good Beer). Yes, I’m talking about the ShamWow! So, I watched the demonstration and indeed, this miracle cloth is just as good in real life as it is on those great commercials, although I was disappointed the girl selling the ShamWows was not wearing a headset. I don’t think I need to say, but in case you’re wondering, I did buy a ShamWow! and am loving every minute of it. They’re sitting in the living room right now and have managed to suck every last drop of moisture out of the air.